I am sitting in an internet cafe in India with sweat dripping down my back into my butt crack and down my thighs soaking my flip flops. I am disgusting right now and covered in sweat but Kate and I are laughing..... 24 hours ago that was not the case.
24 hours ago while sitting in a cafe waiting thirty minuted for a butter walnut muffin I lost my marbles and started to cry. India had gotten the best of me and there was no keeping it in. It is so extremely difficult to explain what India is like and how the country tests you on absolutely every possible level. But when you end up crying over a butter walnut muffin you know your affected.
After a month in India I had hit the point where the country had stolen my peace. All I wanted to do was escape. I was tired of being hot, harassed, starred at, yelled at, felt up, haggled, lied to, lost, confused, exhausted, sick, dirty, covered in dirt/poop/pimples/wounds, followed, chased, and stinky.
Kate looked at me from across the table, as a cried into my butter walnut muffin, with the 'I know how your feeling girl' look in her eyes. I didn't feel like my self and my mind was planning an escape. I considered changing my flight and called my Dad's girl friend leaving a barely audible, blubbering message, stating something like 'I just can't handle this anymore'. It's not that India isn't amazing or that I am not enjoying myself, it's just that it is constantly in your face, every second of every moment. The country and the people test your patience on a level nothing can prepare you for. This is place which forces you to see things you wish you hadn't and do things you would never do again. It is life changing on so many levels.
Which leads me back here, sitting in an internet cafe with sweat dripping down my back and my thighs, laughing with Kate at the amazing and interest things that continue to occur on our adventure. Today my laughing partner taught me that traveling has a cycle, like the cycle of grief. First there is the honeymoon period were the country can do no wrong. Second, is the reality period were you see a country for what it actual is. Third, comes the frustration period were everything drives you insane and you shake your head at everything you see, hear, and experience in utter disbelieve. Finally there is acceptance; acceptance for what the country is, worts and all. Maybe in other countries this cycle is less dramatic and emotionally draining but in India it is extremely powerful. Nevertheless, yesterday I may have cried into my butter walnut muffin but today I fell in love with India all over again.
24 hours ago while sitting in a cafe waiting thirty minuted for a butter walnut muffin I lost my marbles and started to cry. India had gotten the best of me and there was no keeping it in. It is so extremely difficult to explain what India is like and how the country tests you on absolutely every possible level. But when you end up crying over a butter walnut muffin you know your affected.
After a month in India I had hit the point where the country had stolen my peace. All I wanted to do was escape. I was tired of being hot, harassed, starred at, yelled at, felt up, haggled, lied to, lost, confused, exhausted, sick, dirty, covered in dirt/poop/pimples/wounds, followed, chased, and stinky.
Kate looked at me from across the table, as a cried into my butter walnut muffin, with the 'I know how your feeling girl' look in her eyes. I didn't feel like my self and my mind was planning an escape. I considered changing my flight and called my Dad's girl friend leaving a barely audible, blubbering message, stating something like 'I just can't handle this anymore'. It's not that India isn't amazing or that I am not enjoying myself, it's just that it is constantly in your face, every second of every moment. The country and the people test your patience on a level nothing can prepare you for. This is place which forces you to see things you wish you hadn't and do things you would never do again. It is life changing on so many levels.
Which leads me back here, sitting in an internet cafe with sweat dripping down my back and my thighs, laughing with Kate at the amazing and interest things that continue to occur on our adventure. Today my laughing partner taught me that traveling has a cycle, like the cycle of grief. First there is the honeymoon period were the country can do no wrong. Second, is the reality period were you see a country for what it actual is. Third, comes the frustration period were everything drives you insane and you shake your head at everything you see, hear, and experience in utter disbelieve. Finally there is acceptance; acceptance for what the country is, worts and all. Maybe in other countries this cycle is less dramatic and emotionally draining but in India it is extremely powerful. Nevertheless, yesterday I may have cried into my butter walnut muffin but today I fell in love with India all over again.
